PuMPkiN

I cant get enough PUMPKIN!!!! Some of my favs are...
-Kneaders PUMPKIN Steamer
-Kneaders PUMPKIN Bread
-Great Harvest PUMPKIN chocolate chip bread
-Carving and picking PUMPKINS
-PUMPKIN cupcake and PUMPKIN spice candles from Bath and Body Works
-My PUMPKIN bars with almond cream cheese frosting
-My PUMPKIN cake roll
-PUMPKIN pie with whip cream
-Corner Cafe Gingerbread PUMPKIN Bundt cake
-Krispy Kreme PUMPKIN Cake Doughnuts
-JCW's PUMPKIN shakes
-Dryers Slow Churned PUMPKIN Ice cream
-Charlie Brown's...The Great PUMPKIN
-PUMPKIN pancakes
-PUMPKIN art work from my kids

Millcreek Canyon*Fall Colors*Bronco Rides

Favorite favorite favorite time of year!!! and this year the colors seem so bright and vivid... maybe im noticing more because of where we live now and having such a beautiful view of the mountains. We live about 5 minutes away from the base of the beautiful Millcreek Canyon, which has always been a favorite of ours and this year we are tying to take major advantage of that. Ryan and the big kids have been so lucky to be able to ride up it in the Bronco. I trail behind them with Audrie in the van... and love watching their faces smile and their hair whip about as the cuddle under a blanket when the sun starts to go down. The Bronco is a family favorite... and I even dare say Ryan loves his Bronco as much as one of his own kids! He has taken many rides up there all by himself. Ryan is also is a master chef when it comes to making hobo dinners (tin foil dinners) He loves to make them and set up a camp fire and cook them. Which works out well since I am a self proclaimed master smore maker :). We work good together like that. So the past couple of weeks we have gone up by ourselves and also friends and enjoyed the great outdoors and this beautiful time of year. I hope hope hope its a long fall season!!!

Butterscotch

Nana and Papa had a big surprise for all the grandkids this week.... they could hardly wait to see. they bought the kids a new pony!! The sweetest little Welch pony. He is 12 years old and full grown and a perfect size for all the kids to ride and have  a great time with! His name is Butterscotch or Butters or Scotchie (my favorite). They all got to take rides on him... even my Audrie did great. She snag and hummed as she went around the arena. My Claire is in love and talked about him all week, Ella rode great being able to steer all by herself. And Mason was awesome. He hasnt been on a horse in forever but didnt need any help and rode around the arena all by himself. Thanks Nana and Papa... we look forward to getting to know Butterscotch better!!!

moments that make my day

Yesterday I was thinking that there are so many small moments in a day that bring me pure joy. But because they are small or seem to pass by quickly it can be easy not on focus on them... which is what needs to change. So the past couple of days I tried to savor those moments and I realised my heart was full of gratitude and appreciation... here are some of my moments...
making cookies with my girls. seeing Audries face in the morning. seeing Mason make a great play in football. the beds are all made. the crisp sweet smell of trees. Ryan coming home. Ryan is home. the kids are in bed and its quiet. drinking a hot chocolate at night. a call from a friend just to say hi. Claires giggle. listening to Ella sing. Masons hugs at night. watching Audrie as she is learning something. dinner was a success. i got a shower today. seeing all the stuffed animals lined up dressed for a party. having a dishwasher. talking in bed with Ryan. October sports. watching Ella go to the bus stop with her sparkle back pack. Sammy. Claire got her kick over. feeding Audrie her bottle. love my green smoothie in the morning. calls from my parents. smell of my pumpkin candle. view of the mountains. diet coke. call from Claires preschool teacher.  family prayers. kids nightly prayers. quick nap during the day. slobbery kisses from Audrie. Ella did her own pony tail. clean bathroom. dinner at cheesecake factory with friends. laughing with friends. being a little raunchy with friends. Masons smile when he wrestles with his dad. my girls playing outside together. I didn't freak out one time at my kids when they were fighting. re-runs or Raymond, Cheers and Friends at night. its conference weekend.

Claire is 4

My Claire Bear is 4!! Where in the world did that time go! September 8, 2008 really seems like yesterday... I can remember the feeling of excitement of delivering her... not knowing if the baby was a boy or girl and then seeing her for the first time wasn't like seeing someone for the first time... it was like a reunion of sorts. I knew she was mine and I was hers the very second I saw her. My Claire Bear.

It seems like shes been 4 forever though... she has always been go grown up and smart that I swear she wasn't a baby or toddler for very long. Her little mind is so quick and smart... she has an incredible memory on her and learns things so quick. Very competitive but with the sweetest heart. She is social and brave but at the same time has a sweet shy side, especially around crowds. Has the best most infectious laugh, I love listening to it. She is silly and definitely has a bit of crazy in her. LOVES her daddy... a total daddy's girl. I have never seen a little girl look at their daddy the way she does to hers. Their bond is special and amazing! Loves to help me around the house. Gets mad quickly and is known for slamming doors. Loves to tumble and dance and wants to play soccer. A friend to all. Loves her cousins. Is a great big sister and a devoted little sister. Best friends with her sisters and brothers. So funny and so fun to be with. Wants to just play and play! Loves to play babies and dolls. Lia is her very best friend. A huge snuggler and loves to cuddle and give loves. She is the first to climb into bed with us in the mornings and the last to let go of hugs. Loves animals... especially dogs and horses. Fast... the girl can run fast. And she is strong... her little body is a solid muscle. Favorite colors are purple, pink and blue. Loves sprinkles and smoothies. A great eater... will try just about anything. Sneaky and sassy at times. What can I say... I am in love with her. My little buddy and shadow. I am one lucky mom.

For her birthday we gave her the American Girl Doll... McKenna and her dog Cooper! She loved it!! And she wanted to go the Fugi for her birthday dinner but with one condition... that she could sit on her dads lap and close her eyes during the "fire" part. We had a great time celebrating her. She is just indescribable to me and full of life. I wanna be her when I grow up! Love you Bear!

Where do I start....

I miss this... I havent blogged in over a year and I miss this. Im so mad at my self for letting this go. Something I completely enjoy doing, something my family loves reading and looking at, and something that helps me feel like I am doing something to perseve our history. And I let it go for over a year. What can I say... life got crazy, an understatement of the century. And now I have no idea where to start or how to catch up lifes events or how to even remember all my kids milestnes and amazing moments. Really so sad. So here I sit wondering where to start. And kicking myself for letting go of something I enjoy. I'm learning that about myself... when life has gotten out of control the things I love and I am working on are always the first to go. I guess its call "survival mode" but... I have got to learn to find some balance and not go into complete shut down mode. So where do I start... instead of trying to recreate everything and put together broken pieces I am going to move forward and start with today. 
So today.... today is about BRAVERY. I was watching a talk show this morning and an actress was on promoting her new children's book about "firsts" and my kids instantly came into my mind. They are the perfect example to me of bravery. Here we are in our new house with new rooms, going to new schools, making new friends, going to a new ward, starting in new programs, learning a a new neighborhood etc... and they have never once let fear overcome them. They have stepped in and with smiles and confidence found their places in all the newness and firsts. They are my heros and I am so proud of them for enduring this journey and being such amazing examples to their dad and I! They are the definition of being BRAVE.. LOVE THEM SO MUCH. Heres to many more "firsts" may they always be exciting for them. and an opportunity for them to grow.

Audrie Mackay Lund

She is finally here!! My Audrie is here! And she is just as sweet if not sweeter than I thought she would be. Just to back up a bit... 9 months to be exact, she came to me at a very hard and difficult time in both Ryan's and my life. We weren't "trying" to have a baby at the time which normally it takes Dr's visits, medicine, counting, stressing, and lots of time to bring one of our babies to us. But our Heavenly Father knew that she needed to come and sent her at the perfect time. There were so many times during my pregnancy when I just couldn't wait to hold her. I just needed to feel my baby in my arms. She is my hope baby, my baby that reminded me that the Lord is mindful of me and knows what my family needs. My pregnancy was overall pretty good laced with a few "normal" problems such as kidney stones and sciatica... Nasty stuff. But it definitely wasn't one that I hated and it actually went by pretty quick.
So we were hoping to have this little angel on 11/11/11 (fun bday, right) but that didn't happen despite our best efforts. Her actual due date was 11/24/11 but Dr. Yamishero said he wouldn't induce me more than a week early. It actually turned out perfect. Apparently the hospital was crazy on the 11th and delivered 60 babies that day. But when we came in on the 14th all was calm and we got a wonderful nurse and lots of attention.
So labor and delivery.... we got there at 8am. I was positive for Strep B and had to be on 4 hrs of antibiotics before they would break my water. So they started me on some pitocin and told me to hang tight for a few hrs. My contractions during that time weren't too bad... no need for an epidural at that point, I was able to work through them. Just before 12pm my nurse came in and said that it was a good time to get my epidural because the anesthesiologist was about to go in surgery and then I would have it when they broke my water and I would be all set to go with hopefully a quick ending. So the guy came in and did his thing during of which my water broke... while he was placing the big needle in my back and having a contraction! OUCH! Never had that happen before. That is also the first time I have felt my water break. It was like this big surprising POP, to which I was told "to hold still" during... yeah right! Anyways, a few minutes later Dr Yamishero came in to break my water and instead just checked me. To my disappointment I was only at a 3 (which is where i was at when I came in) and maybe 80% effaced. Again... disappointment. That all happened around 12:15-12:30ish and from that point on... OH MY GOSH... she was coming! The epidural didn't take very well on my right side so I felt more than I was hoping to. But by 1:40 or so I was ready to push. In an hours time I was at a 10 and totally effaced. Oh man... going that fast does not make you feel very good... I was sick to my stomach, shaky and a major headache. Luckily Ryan was wonderful and such a support and so loving. Ryan quickly called my mom and said you maybe have 20 minutes before this baby gets here... hurry. And the nurse called Yami and luckily they both walked in the same time! 4 or so pushes later she was HERE!!!! Bigger, sweeter and with way more hair than we imagined!! Crazy part about the whole delivery was that Yami had 2 other girls ready to deliver at the same time as ME. But because this was my 4th he let me go first but after I delivered her he literally ran outta the room leaving me in all my glory... cord hanging out and no placenta delivered yet. GROSS! If that doesn't make you feel attractive nothing will :) Ryan was able to help deliver her too. He gowned up and was the first to catch her and then cut the cord. (I love that about him. He has been able to deliver all our kids but Ella .) So an hour later... yes an hour later, Yami came back and finished the job. But in the meantime I got to hold the sweetest baby girl EVER! She didn't even cry... she literally laid in my arms and talked to me... just cued and cued. Eyes wide open and ready to chat and tell me all about it. She weighed 8 lbs 9 oz and was 20 inches long. By far my biggest baby! We were all in love.
A different and great part about after the delivery was that she never left my arms... They did her newborn check in my room, they let her wheel on up to the room with me and it literally wasn't until 9pm when I finally asked if she could have a bath that they took her for one. It was crazy... usually they've taken my babies straight to the nursery for a few hours until i see them again. But not this time. And I actually really liked it!
I loved my whole delivery... the care was wonderful from my husband and mom to the doctors and nurses. It was smooth and fast with no complications. Practically perfect.
I had been debating whether or not I wanted to nurse at all with her during my entire pregnancy... and I was pretty positive I didn't want to. I did not enjoy nursing my others at all. But I thought I would try in the hospital and that was about it... to my surprise she is a pro and loves it! OH NO! What am I in for??
That night when Ryan went home I sent her to the nursery around midnight and was looking forward to SLEEP!!! HOORAY! I slept on my BACK with my EYEPILLOW and my EARPLUGS and some needed DRUGS and slept wonderfully for 7 hours!!! Best sleep EVER!!! And I got to do that for 2 nights:) I have to admit, I love staying in the hospital! All I have to worry about is me and this tiny sweet newborn. I get food brought to me, friends and family come to visit, I can sleep all I want. IT is fabulous! I'm kinda strange like that! I did have one crazy night though... it was around 7pm and everyone had gone home for the night so it was just me and Audrie watching TV and all the sudden the fire alarms start going off! YIKES... what does this mean and what am i suppose to do. I peaked out in the hall and asked what I should do and was told to pack a small bag and stay in my room until further notice. AHHH panic. I could smell smoke so I called Ryan and told him what was going on and he might need to come back... All the sudden I could hear firemen up and down the halls, coming in and out of rooms, and nurses running around putting on these crazy vests that had these 3 big pouches in the front, which I later learned were fire proof and for the babies that the moms couldn't carry out on their own. SCARY! Luckily after 20 minutes or so the alarm turned off and we were told not to worry....OKAYYYY. I couldn't really get a straight explanation on what happened, I was told the ventilation system sucked in the smoke of a near by camp fire. YEAH RIGHT. Whatever it was I was glad it was over and no big problems were happening.
I fell in love with this little girl before I even saw her. She has brought me so much hope and peace already. Holding her is indescribable. She is this perfect dark haired, blued eyed, long toes and fingers, and looks just like her brother, little baby girl that has already brought more joy to me than I could ask for. I am going to LOVE being her mom. What an honor it is to have another daughter of God in my arms. I am always amazed at what giant spirits these little bodies have.
I LOVE YOU AUDRIE!! And thank my Heavenly Father for this gift!! It is going to be a pleasure to raise her!!